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An Odd Sensation...

Over the past day or two, while we've been seriously packing and getting the place in order for Cazman, I've had this feeling of discomfort, as though instead of packing suitcases and going overseas for a couple of weeks, we're packing up and moving out.

I suppose this place really has become something of a haven from the outside world for us. Until two and a half years ago, I don't think I ever really enjoyed going back to the place I lived, at least not without it being diluted by a bit of fear. It makes me cherish this wonderful little home Vickie and I have made here, even if we do get homebody-ish and insular now and again.

So I suppose this little anxiety that's been running through the back of my heart these past couple of days is fear of leaving the cocoon, the safe harbour. I read a book a while ago called Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, and that mantra's been helping me get over this. I am looking forward to seeing Grandma, Aunt Heather and England again - I think I told Vickie once that I like places as much as I like people - and I'm looking forward to showing Vickie around (and off). But it's still just a little uncomfortable heading out of the nest to do so.

UPDATE:

Old Comments

As long as we are together, we take 'home' with us. The things we leave in Fraser Rd. will still be here when we return. It is our home, but only while we live in it. Home is part of a state of mind. I love our nest too, but only because I share it with you.

This trip is an adventure. We've had some pretty large ones in the last few years and I don't suppose this will be our last.

I've had my worries about this trip too, but that's only because it's my first time in the UK in 47yrs. It's also my first time visiting Gran, so I think I've good reason to be nervous.

I guess we are both like a couple of snails...a bit reluctant, but we have *home* with us.

Love,
Vickie.

Posted by: Vickie at November 3, 2003 09:30 AM

Insert the 'Fear is the Mind Killer' mantra from Dune here, cause I can't remember it.


Well, *somebody* had to geek this discussion up.

Gav.

Posted by: Gav at November 3, 2003 05:19 PM

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

Happy now?

Posted by: IMAGinES at November 8, 2003 10:24 PM
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